i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here