she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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