Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
pray to the hookup gods
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
