what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
