So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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