My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He is an equal opportunity slut.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
