i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
