oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
