Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I think my vagina is haunted
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
