ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
