how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
