There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
