I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
