I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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