At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
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