she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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