fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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