THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?