yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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