Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
