what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Dick very happy bro
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize