im holly from the hills drunk
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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