My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
honey bunches of taint.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
