no you cant smoke seaweed
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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