We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
