Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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