oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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