I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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