No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize