im having a threesome with these popsicles
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
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