I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Randomize
