Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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