I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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