should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
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its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
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Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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