Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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