Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
