Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
