Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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