Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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