he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
