there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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