worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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