My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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