Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
