THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
