Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
My cat gives me a boner
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
