If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
