and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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