i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
