the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
