even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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